Category Archives: Rants

Hillary Clinton and her “Basket of Deplorables”

 cnn_hillary-800x430  Hillary has driven me closer to consider voting for Trump than any argument I’ve heard from an actual Trump supporter with her elitist, snobbish, condescending rubbish dropping from her corrupt mouth.  Does anyone remember the brouhaha when Romney declared that 47% of the population wouldn’t vote for him in the last election cycle.  The media went apoplectic in the ensuing week as they colored him as an elitist oligarch who couldn’t relate to the real people of the lower classes.
Well, if you want to see a whole new level of hubris, check out what Hillary Clinton said this week-end, though you can expect the fawning leftists of the mainstream press to give her a press or even agree with her.
Before going further, read her comments HERE.
She has provided the public with a rare view into what she really thinks of the pehillary-angry-2ople she would aspire to “rule”.

It would serve us well to remember that when she says “homophobic” — she means someone who believes in traditional marriage between a man and a woman. When she says “racist” — she means someone who believes that cops should be respected, that all lives matter, BLM is a divisive movement and that helping people of color means more than throwing money in their general direction. When she says “misogynist” — she means those who think that a baby has a right to LIFE more than a woman has a right to kill an inconvenient infant. When she says “xenophobic” — she means people that think that borders and immigration laws should be respected. When she says “Islamaphobic” — she means those who think that coddling terrorists who practice a violent religion needs to stop. When she says “Basket of Deplorables” — she means God-fearing people who care about their country, respect traditional values, believe gun-ownership is a Constitutional right and aren’t ashamed to wave an American flag — you know, people like those who don’t protest in the streets, burn down convenience stores, didn’t attend Ivy League indoctrination centers and don’t draw their income from the Federal government.hillary-clinton-angry

This despicable and corrupt woman belongs in a prison cell, not in a Presidential campaign. She has accidentally
revealed her true thinking and make no mistake, if you are one of those who would fit in her “basket of deplorables” (and I am), she will not be satisfied until she has stripped you of ever opportunity to oppose the agenda of those who belong in her own “basket of depravity and delusion”.
She is a menace, a danger, a criminal, a coward and an opportunist.

And that’s just what we know for sure about her.

And she’s done the one thing that I didn’t think was possible: made me consider voting for her opponent.  I never thought it was even possible.

Real Men Don’t Need Safe Spaces, They ARE Safe Spaces

Angry Girl SpaghettiRecently, I have seen a plethora of silly articles about patriarchy, cis-gendered masculinity, oppressive gender identity and the like.  Granted, men can be monsters — just like women.  Biologically, they have a predisposition to violence that is directly related to the presence of testosterone which is what causes dominance and aggressiveness.  But that does not mean that all men or even most men are Neanderthalish barbarians.  It means that we need to recognize the differences in roles between men and women and it also means we Angry Feminist On boardneed to lay off the millennial sport of bashing men and masculinity.

I believe that it is a good thing to be a man. God created men physically, chemically, biologically and spiritually to lead, protect, advance and demonstrate strength. To be otherwise is unnatural.

I believe that the role of “father” is a sacred role. Good dads aren’t insensitive louts, they aren’t lazy couch potatoes, they live passionately for their wife and children and they work hard to take good care of their family.

I believe that men ought to treat ladies with respect. They should honor them as the treasure that they are. They should watch out for them, protect them, make them feel special. Real men don’t need pornography – it is an insult to the wives, mothers and daughters to indulge in it. Real men treat the women in their life the way that they would want their daughters or mothers or sisters treated. It is tragic, to me, that so many women today have bought into a feminist mentality that precludes accepting the courteous behavior of a gentleman for the act of honor that it is.

Angry DadI believe that men can love God without being some sort of limp-wristed mama’s boy. God created man in His image. We can have His qualities as part of our character. We aren’t ashamed of our need for a Savior, our devotion to Christ, our submission to the Word of God and if we are – well, then our faith is as phony as our manhood.

I believe that men can be great husbands. We can have the character to remain faithful. We can have the passion to provide romance. We can make a commitment to stay with one woman for our entire life and keep it. We can take care of our wife, help her with the children, support her in her professional endeavors and love her without end. Real men don’t abandon their wives, they don’t hit on the women at work, they don’t ogle cheap women in real life or in advertisement or on screens and they don’t treat their wife poorly.  Real men never….as in NEVER raise a hand toward a woman, they don’t act threatening toward a woman and they understand the definition of the word “NO.”

I believe that men can keep commitments. I believe that a man will understand that a man’s word is his honor. A man who will not keep his word or who will not go to the offended when he has been unable to do so has a character problem that he needs to consider. I believe a man should consider his handshake as good as a notarized signature.

Angry Working ManI believe that men ought to be hard workers. We sweat, we smell, we work overtime, we have rough hands and we don’t quit until the job is done. Even when we play, we make it like work and usually end up hot, tired, bleeding or dirty. And almost always – hungry.

I believe real men are balanced. We can swing a sledge and cuddle a baby. We can change the oil and put a Band-Aid on a skinned knee. We can fight an enemy and shelter a family with the same arms. We can shout at the stadium or cry before God at the church. We are not one-dimensional.

I believe that men can be great dads. They teach kids how to bait hooks, throw a ball and Angry Daddyhandle the school bully. Real dad’s wrestle their kids in the living room floor until their mother about has a heart attack and when the kids get up, they are going to ask for more. Real dad’s work extra jobs to help their kids have a better life than they had. Real dad’s may gag at dirty diapers and tickle kids until they cry, but have someone threaten to harm their loved ones and you’ll see a toughness you could never imagine.

Angry GuysSo enough of the emphasis on gender fluidity.  Enough whining from triggered radical feminists who see every man as some sort of threat to their identity.  Enough of the feminization of this generations boys.  Embrace your role.  Enjoy your uniqueness.  Respect the differences.  Except your limitations and expand your strengths.  If you are a man, it’s a good thing.  And if you are woman, it is as well.

Women should not need “safe spaces” away from reasonable masculinity.  In fact, masculinity — rightly defined and executed — should BE the Safe Space for those who understand and embrace the reality that equality does not mean uniformity.

Jack-Booted Fascists of the Radical Left Take on Duck Dynasty’s Phil Robertson


In one of the most insane moves since Coke introduced “New Coke” to a fan base that didn’t want corporate eggheads messing with the things they enjoyed, A&E announced tonight that they are suspending Duck Dynasty star and patriarch Phil Robertson for personal remarks he made opposing homosexuality.  Instantly, the twitterverse lit up with boycotts, outrage and disgust — similar to that found when the LBGT extremists took on Chick-Fil-A because the founder also expressed his personal opinions.

Once again, the public is shown that “tolerance” is a one-way street and the First Amendment doesn’t apply to those who dare refuse the group think of political correctness.  Every time the Human Rights Campaign, GLAAD or any other LBGTQ spokesmen gets the vapors over someone daring to question their lifestyle choices, some corporate scaredy cat freaks and throws freedom of speech, freedom of religion and the right to free expression of unpopular thoughts or opinions under the bus faster than one can say “Rosie O’Donnell”.

Hopefully, the rocket-scientist dropouts at A&E will get a hopper-full of email post haste which might drive them to their senses.  Care to drop the fine folks in charge an email expressing your opinion (while you still can without getting kicked off the internet)?  Here’s the contact email:

Here’s a list of the A&E Stations:

Here’s a link to the article announcing the decision:


Ben Carson and the Intolerance of the Radical Left

Dr. Ben Carson, world-renown African-American Pediatric Neurologist Surgeon and Professor at Johns Hopkins University is the latest victim of radical leftist fascism.  Read about what happened HERE.

This just reminds us that liberals have no interest in “Free Speech” in spite of their rhetoric. They only want “approved speech”. Don’t burden their straw houses of thought and their extremist agenda with counter arguments or other perspectives. “Tolerance” is only a demand they hurl at their enemies which is code, for “Shut Up if you disagree.” These people are far more hateful, narrow-minded, fascist and tyrannical than the imaginary caricatures they create for enemies. What is sadder still is that uniformed and uneducated low information people are just letting them destroy legitimate dialogue for fear that someone might call them “intolerant” or “bigoted” or some other 2-cent epithet that perverts that historic lexicon of civilization. Political correctness is destroying our character, our morality, our intellectual integrity and our Liberty. Orwell predicted all of this — and yet, most people have never read 1984 or Animal Farm. We will be damned by our laziness and lack of courage.

Perhaps THIS professor or THIS one would pass the political perspective of Johns Hopkins liberals.

The Auschwitz in Philadelphia…

abortion.jpgIf there was ever a death penalty case — this is it, right here. (<– Click on the link to read the article.)  How anyone can support abortion, politicians who support abortion, medical practices who recommend abortion, gynecologists who endorse abortion — is just beyond me.  This is intentional, pre-meditated murder and I believe both the medical personnel and the woman carrying the child should be prosecuted.  This “medical assistant” is as guilty as the SS Guard who dropped the acid tablets into the gas chambers at Auschwitz.

And enough of this mamby-pamby attitude toward females who want to get rid of their child — this is cold-blooded murder and they are as culpable as is the doctor.

abortion2.jpgWhiny liberals weeping at abused dogs and clubbed seals while support this genocidal butchery have ZERO credibility.  These are human beings — Defenseless, helpless, innocent babies. — who are being “put down” with less dignity than they’d give an aging Rover.  Anyone who feigns compassion for snail darters and spotted owls and unspayed kitties and doesn’t speak out against abortion is a hypocrite.

Now Is The Time for All Good Men….to stand up and oppose Gun Control

2amendment.jpgThe Gun Control hue is increasing rapidly.

Some are now specifically calling for confiscation.

If you say this can’t happen or it can’t happen quickly– I have one word for you: Obamacare.

They keep saying, “Hunter’s don’t need ‘assault’ rifles.” That’s like saying, “Writer’s don’t need to be able to draw political cartoons.”

That is not the point of the 1st Amendment and hunting is not the point of the 2nd Amendment. The 2nd Amendment is not about our right to hunt. It is about our right to protect ourselves from Tyranny. If the 1st Amendment can be construed to protect pornography and lying about your military service awards (both upheld by the SCOTUS), then the 2nd Amendment must be interpreted to protect types of guns that some might find “offensive”.

The NRA needs to step back out of the shadows and get front and center about this NOW. This is not a time for weakness or fear of being unpopular. What if Obama/Holder decide to do by Executive Order what they may not be able to do legislatively with gun control? With each power grab, this President looks more and more like Hugo Chavez and remember, he has been popularly elected by the poor and ignorant over and over again.

Obama is polarizing this country so deeply and quickly that conversations about secession and even the potential for Civil War are now being held in previously polite circles. If the American public thought that what happened on December 14th was a massacre, how much more of a massacre should be expected should they try to take the guns of 60 million determined and ticked-off gun owners by force? But in the words of Rahm Emmanuel, this administration is not going to “waste a good crisis” in order to advance their agenda at the expense of our liberties. They keep drawing the line deeper, clearer and more deeply on OUR side of the Constitution. These are dangerous days of shocking change. We must be vigilant in educating others.

Never under-estimate the tenacity with which extremist liberals and socialists and their media machine are prepared to exercise their power in order to get their way.

The Hypocrisy that is “Pro-Choice”

You simply HAVE to take a minute and watch these interviews from the recent Democrat National Convention held in my hometown of Charlotte, North Carolina.  The issue of Abortion is a very important and very personal issue for me and I frankly do not care if someone is offended by my discussion of it from any angle.  This video shows you the lack of intellectual integrity the “pro-choicers” have when it comes to the slaughter of innocent children in their mother’s womb.  It would be humorous were we not talking about racist, xenophobic genocide.

View it HERE.

The Republicans and Clint Eastwood — No Better Than the Democrats

eastwood.jpgHad I been watching the Democrat National Convention, I would not have been surprised.  They have years of experience in grooming the extreme left that makes California, and more specifically, Hollywood, their home.  Every convention and in every occupancy of the White House by Democrats, you can anticipate a constant stream of starlets and stud-muffins “gracing” the people’s house with their glamor and celebrity.  I’d expect no less.

But, the longer I think about the Republicans giving Clint Eastwood a prime-time spot last night, the angrier I get.

Forget the fact that he gave one of the most incoherent and ridiculous “speeches” in the history of party conventions, there’s more.  In fact, inviting him for such a prime time slot just embodies much of what is wrong with American politics in general and in this case, the Republicans specifically.

Clint Eastwood is a reprehensible person.  For all his talent in which he pretends to be people that never existed in stories that never happened, his moral character makes Obama’s look like a Pope (or should I say an Oman”).  Rubio’s speech included the line that said, “It’s not that Obama is not a good person; it’s that he’s not a good President.”  Well, Mr. Eastwood isn’t a good person.

I’m not sure how many times he’s been married, but in an industry where philandering is common place, Eastwood is legendary.  He’s been married more times than I can recall.  He’s fathered 9 children by at least 5 different women and 2 of those were murdered in the womb.  Many of my FB friends went on and on about his “wonderful” movies.  I’m not sure whether or not he’s all that as an actor because I don’t generally attend R-Rated movies which is what the majority of his are.  Before you call me a legalist — Let me ask if you’d take your kids to see “Dirty Harry” or most any other movie in which he is the star?  Not if you’re a good parent.  He’s not pro-life, he’s not pro-family, he’s not family values friendly, he’s not known for being a moral example, an entrepreneur, a patriot, a war hero or a statesman.  He’s most certainly NOT a standup comedian.

He’s a Libertarian, not a Conservative — at best.  (You aren’t going to believe I’m typing this next line.) If they wanted a Libertarian to speak, why didn’t they let someone who is at least a person of morality, a good example, a family man, an intellectual, consistent and at least pretended to be a Republican for a while — someone, like, well…..Ron Paul? (And I’m a renowned Paul critic.)  At least he “earned” a spot on the podium.

celebrity.jpgNo, the reason that Eastwood was invited is because of one word — Celebrity.  That’s it.  He’s famous.  He uttered a famous line or two that people found “catchy” and worked their way into the cultural lexicon.  Whoopee.  What is with our national obsession with Hollywood and the entertainment industry?  What makes us bow and scrape before their alleged talents?  Why are we so quick to genuflect before their worthless opinions?  Why are they not held to any level of scrutiny, accountability or apparently vetting?  Ironically and justly,. the Republicans had it all blow up in their faces.  It was a travesty.  It was silliness.  It lowered the ambient IQ in the room by 20 points.  It was childish.  At times it was unintelligible.  AND it revealed the shallowness of the leadership of too many politicians….again.

The worst job in the house last night was Marco Rubio’s, who had to follow that dog and pony show.  Like the class act that he is, Rubio ignored what had preceded him and went right on to deliver what was arguably one of the best speeches of the conventions — nearly over-shadowing the candidate’s and making more than one conservative say under his breath, “We’ve nominated the wrong man.”

I doubt that anything will change in the future.  Both sides of the aisle are enamored with the superficiality of the Eastwoods, Moores, Depps, Clooney’s, Streisands, and Goldbergs of the industry that pollutes our culture, morality and reputation around the world.

But it is what it is.

I’m sure some will disagree.

To those I simply say, “Go ahead.  Make my day.”

Can We Have a Truce on the “War On Christmas?”

It seems that every once in a while, I feel compelled to write a blog article that ticks off many of my “own kind”.  (By “own kind” I mean generally conservative, Bible-believing Christ followers.)  This is one of those posts.  So here I go….

I’m really quite weary of the annual hullaballoo about how the evil atheists/secularists/liberals/Democrats/communist pinkos are trying to remove “Christ from Christmas”.  Quite frankly, it has been going on all my life as far as I 000war-on-christmas.jpgcan tell.  (As exhibit one, I would use the long-debated use of “X-Mas” in place of “Christmas” which actually has quite a logical and historical explanation which one can find HERE, but which, I’m regularly told means nothing because today’s “X-Mas” users really are still trying to take “Christ” out of “CHRISTmas”.  But I digress…)  The skirmish became a “war” when FOX News talking, er, shouting head, John Gibson wrote a book entitled The War on Christmas which became a seasonal best seller.  In it, he used alleged and real incidents of attempts by whackjobs, nut cases and actual enemies of the Gospel who are trying to remove the religious significance from the “holyday”.

But sometimes, in my always humble opinion, we just make ourselves look like fools.  At least I hope it is that and not something more ethically distasteful like trying to exploit a non-controversy for the purpose of fundraising.  Speaking of that, here’s the one that lit my fuse today. sent out the hot story of how the U.S. Government is forbidding our elected officials from saying “Merry Christmas“.  You can find the link to the story HERE.  If you haven’t been seeing it on the conservative news networks and right-wing blogosphere, basically their contention is that a memo written and distributed this month which reminds members of the U.S. House of Representatives that the law prohibits the use of their free mail (at least free to them, it’s actually paid for by our tax dollars) privileges, also known as “franking” to wish people “Merry Christmas(or Happy Hannukah or Happy New Year or Blessed Kwanza or whatever).  This is sold as yet another overt attempt to prove that Christianity is under attack from the dark forces of the radical left and we must stand and defend our holiday or Christianity is doomed.

OK, OK…just so you know that I’ve not turned pagan and am secretly part of a conspiracy to turn Christmas back to a Winter Solstice event, let me say it here and now:  “Jesus is the Reason for the Season!”  (Yep, I said it.  Burrell Cliche’-Fest is alive and well. Now may I never say that tired, old phrase again.  Seriously.)

But FRANKLY (pun intended), the fact that the U.S. House of Representatives has a policy against wishing constituents “Merry Christmas” is NOT an attack on Baby Jesus.  You have to read the whole policy.  In a nutshell, it is to prevent (additional) frivilous use of this “perk” enjoyed by the many millionaires who stroll our halls of Congress from sending out even MORE junk mail everytime there is a holiday of any kind — be it Christmas or birthdays or weddings or retirement or Eid or deaths or divorces or any other cause for celebration.  All such franked mail is included — not just Christmas.  Can you imagine how many millions of dollars and millions of tons of junk mail could be sent out every stinking holiday if they had this privilege?  While we amass debt at breath-taking rates every single second, this is just one small area in which the government has shown a bit of restraint.  If our beloved congress people want to congratulate their constituents and wish them “Happy Everything“, they are not forbidden to do so.  Just don’t do it on the taxpayers dime!  Use that big ol’ fat campaign chest you’re sitting on (and which they can keep personally when they retire.)  I could not care less if Sue Myrick (R-NC) and Patrick McHenry (R-NC) wish me a Merry Christmas.  It’s not like they personally sign them and include their family newsletter or anything.

What really irritates me about this (and actually, there are SEVERAL things that irritate me), is that it is cynical ploy to get Believers all worked up and fuming and making declarations about the 000afraid.jpggodless Democrats and so on and anyone who has a room temperature IQ and will take 10-minutes of reading time will see that this is completely bogus.  It makes us look like fools to those who DO take the time to find out what is really going on.  We can’t scream about wanting a more fiscally-responsible government and they pitch a fit when they spend tons of cash on sending us meaningless greeting cards.  It’s absurd.  The 1st Amendment is alive and well and this is not some evil conspiracy to silence people of faith.  Far too few people actually read beyond the headline and thus draw (the desired) opinion that this is a religious liberty issue.  It’s simply dishonest to make this policy about the 1st Amendment.

Here’s the real deal… we’ve already destroyed much, if not most, of the religious signficance of Christmas.  Seriously, celebrating the birth of the Christ child is a side-bar at best in a month filled with gross materialism and consumerism, gluttony,indebtedness, insane busyness and for many too much booze.  Sure, the 3x per year church attenders get their fix of religiousity at the annual Christmas Eve Communion Service in which millions of people participate in a sacred church ordinance unworthily.  Sure, many of us set a nativity set on top of the TV or the bar.  Yep, we drop a buck in the red kettle or send a shoebox to an Ethiopian child.  But when it comes right down to it, I don’t think Jesus feels honored by the way we celebrate the alleged (and probably inaccurate) date of His birth.  He probably feels sad.

Whether or not there is a “War on Christmas” we know that there is a spiritual warfare that happens every day of the year.  It began in heaven, took root in Eden and will not be settled until the end of this age.  Everyday the genuine believer should face spiritual opposition if they are seeking to live Biblically and authentically.  Scripture tells us that the Gospel will be a constant offense to the non-believer.  It has the stench of damnation for those who the condemned.  It is a Sword and not a dove to those who reject the Bible, repentance, Jesus and grace.  That’s the real “war” we face.

We don’t need additional evidence that this country is headed to hell in a handbasket.  It is evident all around us.  So let’s quit making a big deal out of non-issues and make the Christmas season a celebration of the Gospel by sharing it with someone, not shouting at them.

I Really Don’t Care if you Wish Me “Happy Holidays” (and other rants of the season)


I’m kind of in a “semi-rant” mood today.  Call it the post Thanksgiving Funk or a Holiday Hangover or whatever.  The older (and crankier) I get, the more disillusioned I am by what “Christmas” has become.  Count me as one that assumes Jesus is appalled (Note: Future theological argument to be had, “Can Jesus be appalled?”) at what is done today in the pretense of celebrating His birthday.  So here are a few Holiday Rants about the time of year…

  • If I see one more church sign or bumper sticker that says, “Jesus is the Reason for the Season”, I swear, I’m gonna’ do some vandalism.  Could anyone possibly get more cliche?  I once drove one hour through the hills of North Carolina and counted 12…as in TWELVE churches that had that insipid little epigram on their church marquis.  Ugh!
  • PLEASE don’t send me your chain emails regarding Keeping CHRIST in Christmas as opposed to using Merry Xmas.  There’s actually an explanation I’ve read that explains the tradition of using the “X” in place of Christ that I’ve since forgotten and I promise you, it doesn’t have anything to do with a Satanic conspiracy.
  • For those of you who want to draw comparisons between SANTA and SATAN, (You know, “Red Suit”, lives in the North, same letters, promises to fulfill your fantasies but is really a lie, etc…, etc…).  Might I suggest you give it a rest and relax just a tad.  If Santa bugs you — don’t have one, don’t pretend with your kids, etc…, but PLEASE stop making it your main cause for the month of December.
  • I think the American Family Association and Bill O’Reilly have turned the whole “Happy Holidays” thing into a cash cow.  (See THIS article written by my friend, Warren Smith.)  I don’t particularly want some floozy perfume pusher in the aisle at Macy’s who happens to be dressed like a Victoria’s Secret Mrs. Santa wishing me a nice celebration of the Lord’s birthday this year.  I’m fine with her saying, “Happy Holiday” or whatever.  Basically, just leave me alone.  Bah Humbug!
  • Back to the AFA and Bill O’Reilly….I think when ever they hear someone say “Happy Holidays”, they also hear a little “ka-ching” sound as it gives them another chance to push their “Keep Christ in Christmas” and “The War Against Christmas” fundraising stickers/books/articles/etc… going for the offended flock for yet another holiday season.
  • I’m going to admit for the first time publicly that I once bought several pages of the USPS’s Muslim “Eid” stamps and used them on my Christmas cards because I thought they looked like little Christmas trees and I’d never hear of an “Eid” or it’s holiday.  In fact, I still don’t know what “Eid” is all about.  Awkward!
  • I would rather be beaten with a rubber hose than hang up the Christmas lights on the Christmas tree.  I’m so glad I’m one of those Baptists that believe in eternal security, because I’m confident I’d have to get saved and baptized again every year after Christmas Tree Decorating Night if I was.
  • I like those little ribbon candies that they sell for next-to-nothing at Walmart.  Well, the ones that taste like fruit at least.
  • I’m not a big fan of the Christmas Eve Candlelight Communion service anymore.  It seems like a lot of people who have absolutely no business taking communion end up doing so just because it’s Christmas eve.  I think the ordinance is too important and too serious to throw open the doors to a bunch of partially inebriated celebrants on  Christmas eve who can’t find the local Catholic church and invite them to participate in something so sacred as a Biblical observance of the Lord’s table.
  • There’s something highly unnatural about hanging your outside Christmas lights while wearing shorts as we do in South Florida.  And in my case, it’s also highly disturbing to see me hanging Christmas lights while I’m wearing shorts (or any other time for that matter).
  • I like a nice Honey-Baked ham for Christmas.  By then, I’m just turkeyed out.
  • I would rather spend $500 extra on Christmas than to go out on Black Friday.  No, wait….make that $5,000.
  • I think they should offer complementary marriage counseling at the place where you pick out your Christmas tree.  It’s better to deal with the consequences of finding just the “right tree” right then and there than to have to go back later for therapy.
  • I’m trying to remember if we ever took the annual family Christmas picture where at least one of the kids did not have red eyes because I made them cry during the process.  Yep….I’m a candidate for coal in my stocking each  year.
  • I’m weird, but I like Christmas letters in the Christmas cards from friends.  I mean seriously, I’m not interested in just seeing your signature again.
  • On the subject of Christmas cards, if you are going to buy a $5.00 Christmas card for me at Hallmarks, just stick the $5.00 in an old envelope and send me a note on notebook paper and I’ll send the 5 bucks to Cuba so that one of my pastor friends there can have a week’s pay instead.
  • OK, I’ll admit it….I’m not a big fan of the Christmas Cantata.
  • Never, not one time in my life, has a single bite of a fruit cake crossed my lips.  I plan on keeping that record intact until the day I die.  For those of you who have given me fruit cakes over the years, I’m sorry and I hope I haven’t hurt your feelings.  The good news is that I have no problem regifting fruit cakes.  So you actually did bless someone.  It’s the thought that counts anyway, right?
  • I miss my Grandma’s chocolate fudge every year at Christmas.  I don’t even try to make it, cuz’ it just doesn’t taste like hers did.
  • In my home town of Moberly, MO, the town drunk often played Santa Claus every year.  I always wondered why his breath smelled funny and then my mom explained it to me once I was old enough to handle the truth.
  • There’s something delightfully challenging about licking a candy cane into a treacherous pointed shard of sugar that could be used to start an IV.1999-burl-ives.jpg
  • Burl Ives is my favorite Christmas singer.  Do not judge me.
  • Amy Grant is my second favorite singer.  You can go ahead and judge me a little about that.
  • There’s something about the ringing of Salvation Army bell that really puts me in the Christmas mood.  I can’t explain it, but it is like watching that old Jimmy Stewart movie that NBC shows in Black and White every year (and which I’ve never actually watched).  At the mall in Charlotte where I used to live, they didn’t like the noise of the bell in the mall, so they shook a paper bell that said “ring” on it.  That just made them look stupid.  But I always put my change in the kettle of a “real” bell ringer.abominable.jpg
  • I still like to watch the cartoon version of “The Grinch that Stole Christmas” and “Charlie Brown’s Christmas.”  I still don’t like to watch the Rudolph the Red-Nose Reindeer Christmas program because at 48, I’m still a little scared of that whole abominable snowman thing.
  • I have to watch Ralphie and the Christmas Story each year.  It’s just not Christmas until I see those guys at the Chinese restaurant sing “Deck the Halls” with their “Far, rar, rar, rar, rar, rar, rar, rar, rar.”  As racist as it might be, it makes me laugh outloud every single time.  And so does the famous long burp-scene from Elf.  I know, I’m immature.  Can’t help it.

jesus-reason-for-the-season.jpgOK….That’s my rant for this Xmas!  Happy Holidays everyone!  Share your rants below.

OH…and “Jesus is the Reason for the Season!”

Note: A previous “edition” of this rant took a cheap shot at Free-Will Baptists in an effort to be humorous.  However, humor is not an excuse for being a less-than-gracious brother in Christ and I have nothing but love and respect for my many Free-Will Baptists friends and apologize for the insensitivity.  Anyone who is foolish enough to paint any sub-grouping of Baptists with a broad brush deserves, well….to be beaten with a rubber hose!  Thanks to my friend, Joe, who pointed this out to me.  DLB